Get down! *bow chicka bowww wowwww* Wait...where'd the music go? We were just getting started here!

There are so many horrible things on this page that I'm not sure where to start, but I think I'm gonna go with the James Bond style page fade-ins.

Unreadable text, siezure inducing (ugly) graphics, load time from a dozen song clips, and *what* is the point of this web page exactly?